What are the Masks we wear?

Darryl Bachmeier
Aug 19, 2019

Many of us living life behind a mask. A mask of self-confidence, confidence, power, wholeness, performance, etc., when we hide who we really are? The problem with masks is that when they become the norm, we lose ourselves in trying to please others.

When someone describes a person as a “mask wearer” the meaning is usually negative, but there are appropriate times and reasonable reasons for wearing the mask.

The reasons for wearing a mask are both positive and negative, and some of the reasons include:

  • To hide fear
  • To Cover Anxiety
  • To be liked and accepted
  • To cover vulnerability
  • Sad to cover sadness/depression
  • Happiness to hide happiness
  • Cheat
  • To cover up your Anger
  • To show masculinity/femininity
  • Manipulating

Why are masks helpful?

Masks can also be helpful in social settings. We wear them often to make the conversation easier. Think small talk - no one will care, but it makes the conversation adequate, we can find the people we connect with and move on to the deeper conversation.

Consider when you see someone passing by, they ask how you are, and you actually respond “well” when you have a bad day.

In general, it’s easy to be uninterrupted in conversation, just knock our heads when someone in the grocery store comments on the price of eggs these days, you cannot really notice less.

Here are 10 masks we wear

By recognizing our protective shields, we can begin to heal from past pains and experience deeper intimacy with our loved ones. Although our coping strategies are as diverse as our personalities, here are ten of the most common masks we wear.

Cool Personality

By all appearances, these people seem to have mastered anything to stay calm in all situations. The person who is not resolved by conflict or confusion has the peace of a Tibetan monk. However, below the surface, one of two things happens.

His bottle-up emotions cause a tense break, or he occasionally presses the release valve when no one is around, breaking everyone who submits to him. He reduces the employee for forgetting his coffee or sends a bad email to his assistant for a small error.


Humor is an excellent defense mechanism. I use it myself. If you laugh, you do not cry even though they look the same. It can and does prevent intimacy. Teasing, in particular, is rooted in pain and is not without consequences.

Overall Achiever

Some unknowingly pursue perfectionism as a defense against annihilation. If everything is done right, their world will not go astray. Recognition and praise associated with being a perfectionist may offer some temporary relief.

However, the perfect person is always at the mercy of something going wrong, so he lives in a constant state of tension. Her stubbornness, frenzy, and despair create a barrier between her and her loved ones.

Bully One

Every environment around us has its bully’s role in the 5th-grade schoolyard. Their emphasis on control can be subtle, and it can be a gentle manipulation or aggression, even physical, as you see their way through.

Although bullies appear to be confident in delivering their strong opinions and order, they are inherently insecure. They want to be mistreated, and they will violate the appropriate rules of conduct to get that respect. Self-doubt leads to their hostile behavior; properly realize the right that comes at the expense of the rights and feelings of others.

Control prank

The sense of control uses order and power to achieve a sense of security. He eliminates his fear of the unknown, ambiguity, and uncertainty by making sure everything is in the right place.

A mother hen, control naughty does not let anyone out of her sight and takes responsibility for everyone around her, even if they do not want to care. He falls apart when someone deviates from the plan.


Suffering from a long-standing lawsuit such as incompetence and insecurity, Self-basher gives others a negative view of herself. Perhaps unknowingly, she believes she can detach herself by hurting herself first.

If so, she is harassing herself and insulting herself as a precautionary measure against any potential gingers. Self-esteem becomes a defense mechanism, with which he avoids any danger in close proximity.


People-happiness will go to great lengths to gain the recognition of those around her because her sense of identity is often based on the evaluation of others. Her values ​​are often blank depending on the input of the day because she looks to external sources to verify who she is.

This type of mask seeks the advice of friends, doctors, specialists, colleagues and mentors because she does not have a strong foundation. The results are very difficult for her, as she is easily affected by others.

An Introvert

The frightened person or introvert is the one who fears death to failure and rejection. He will feel the pain of loneliness more than he does not like danger. For Example, the perfect one is also afraid of making a mistake, and he refuses to challenge himself. He is easily embarrassed, easily embarrassed, and does not say much for fear of saying the wrong thing.

Social Butterfly

The journey of the social butterfly is naturally lonely. Man compensates for insecure feelings with his gift and small talk. They have many acquaintances, but only a few are their true friends.

Although his calendar is full of social events, his life has no meaning. He keeps his conversations superficial because deep conversations can expose his anxiety or spill over into his confident personality.

What is the common denominator of each mask?

Although these masks differ in many ways, they have many things in common.

All the masks provide a function

None of them is inherently pathological or complex, and there is a time and place for each of them. Sensitive healthy people who live real life wear masks from time to time to protect themselves when needed and appropriate.

They protect you

From those who have bad intentions or from those who do not have good intentions. To earn trust, until you get to know someone, it is healthy to keep people arm outstretched and allow them some time at a time.

They only cause problems when overused

All of these masks help you in moderation, but when you wear them too much, you play the risk of losing track of which you are, how you feel, or what you value. When you lose yourself in this way, often-unplanned consequences occur.

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