Dealing with Envy - What is Envy? And How can we Overcome it?

Darryl Bachmeier
Jul 7, 2020

Everyone wants to live everyone’s life; everyone wants to be Tom Cruise, Johnny Depp, Beyoncé, you name it. Everyone wants to reach the peak without really knowing the story behind these successes, how they worked for it, how they labored to get these achievements; all they do is sit back and wish they were the ones in that position. It’s ok to dream big; it is ok to wish you were something you are yet to become.

But when enmity, hate, comes in, it becomes envy. And mind you, envious people don’t grow! Being envious is like abandoning your course, desire, your ambition for someone else’s; there is no way you can be envious of someone’s success and still work on yours; it is very difficult (if not impossible). An envious attitude that is not controlled can degenerate into something more dangerous, worst-case scenario, death.

Today, we see people who are so passionate about building a career in entertainment. Still, on seeing their friend doing well as an engineer, they dump their ambition to attack or sabotage the other person. When you make someone else’s success, your business, your aspirations will indeed suffer. Below, we have listed some helpful facts that can help you overcome envy and put you on the right track.

5 Ways to Overcome Envy

Distract yourself, focus on the Goodness in your Life

One primary reason why we envy is that we have consciously or unconsciously forgotten our purpose in life. Forgetting your purpose is synonymous with undermining your greatness, and since our minds are responsible for playing such tricks, it is time to reciprocate. Once awhile, try to distract your mind from those envious thoughts and focus more on the greater gifts life has to offer. Remind yourself about the endless opportunities that abound in the world, and be thankful for those little achievements you have made so far.

Practice Contentment

You have to constantly remind yourself that nobody has it all, that most celebrated successes might not even be up to your achievements. If you should dig deeper, you find out that their so-called big wins are equal to your so-called small wins. So no matter how backward you think you are, just because of someone else’s one-time achievement, remember that you are still part of the big thing, just that you are too obsessed with the other person’s success to knowing that.

Choose the right Company

You have to watch the kind of people you move with and avoid those who value the wrong things. When we say inappropriate things, we mean people who cherish material things more than human; a typical example is fashion freaks. Again, if they value the car more than occupants, then try your best to avoid them. One bad trait about envy is that it is like a communicable disease. Once it affects one, it is just a matter of time before it affects the next person.

Spend Time with Grateful People

Just like bad habits, gratitude is also highly contagious. Be thankful for other people’s success, and hang out with those that practice the same principle. You have to understand that the universe is ever generous, and only the grateful ones are worthy to benefit from her generosity. So, instead of spending more time hanging out with people who are always in competition with themselves, take a break and stay thankful.


This might be weird, but it is true. Being generous is another way to distract your mind from envy. Try as much as you can to give, even if you have to force yourself. When we say being generous, we mean giving out something of value, not necessarily money; it can be service, skill, talent, e.t.c to tour the community. Try to promote a fight against social injustice and things like that. Only then can you feel responsible for something, thus, giving no room for envy.

Finally, you have to understand that envy and jealousy are like two brothers from different mothers, and they are very interchangeable. You also have to understand that they are primary forces that pull us back from our potentials in life. The first step to dealing with envy is believing in yourself, knowing that you are more than what people see you. Understand that success is a gradual process, that if your neighbor succeeds, it is just a matter of time before it gets to tour turn.

Learn to be patient with life, learn to stay away from any form of distraction, and keep working hard, knowing that your success is underway. Learn to tap from other people’s positive energy and stay away from bad vibes. Never talk down on people, and move away from a group that talks down on you, no matter the relationship you have with them. Remember, envy is a disease that hinders your transition to a higher level of success.

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